1st blog in 2010

There have been a long time I never come to blog n bullshit here d... Haha

10 more days my Final exam for Years 2 sem 2 will start. But I still semi lazy mode. LOL...

Lucky still got touch a bit on RObotics this afternoon.

Actually everyday I telling myself need to work hard in order to success. But I donno why I damn lazy lately. Do not train my body for 1 month... Maybe more than that.. Always give myself reason that "Today a lot work to do save some energy". But then end of the day I did nothing.

HAte it...

Someone got any idea or I need to find my way out?

Tonight my feeling was kind of weird. The thing I like to do become so bored and scary.

Maybe I have too much of this kind memories with other. And it repeat again.

Once I think about the past, I start to scare. * mood swing*

I'm Trying to ask myself again n again it is the 1? Should I continue?

What if the same thing happen again? I am not brave enough to accept it.

Anyway... Everything will be fine... Jz smile ba.. GOD will arrange for me. I think so. :P

Show + Juice

Ninja Assassin - Today I manage to watch the show I had been waiting for few months (been waiting since Sept).

Overall it a nice show. Very "chi kik". ^^

And my idol Rain he is damn YENG in the show... Love him 4ever. ^^

Love really can some1 from ZERO to HERO.

My special recipe - After came back from show I suddenly have the mood to blend some juice to drink. Picture beside is the 1 I made. ^^

Ingredients

2 oranges

1 apple

Ngam ngam 1 cup. Taste nice. Can try. ^^

Return to the begining.

The disease that away from me for a long time it came back to me these few days.
It really bothering me. (Just get lost in front of me...)
Why I can't just like other human being live with a healthy life??
I tried so hard to keep fit and healthy but it doesn't work. It not fair..
Why it wanna following me all the time? It make me sick.
I donno when it will come to the worse and I will SAY GOOD BYE with this world... (Waiting to die)

I Just like 4 years ago.
At college:
Do thing alone, come alone, go back alone (Sometimes friend fetch ^^) Everyone thought I'm hardworking, smart. The real me is very lazy. I'm smart? Haha.. I also can't believe they will said I'm smart. I just have the luck..

At home:
Everyday face the PC once I open my eyes. If nothing special I prefer staying at home the whole day.

When alone
Just like usual missing someone. Wondering what she is doing, happy or not.

It still clear.

Yesterday night I have a dream. That is I dream about the wooden house that I live about 10 years ago. All the memories about there slowly cross over my mind, I feel it just happened yesterday.

The structure of the house I still remember clearly.

2 rooms, 1 wash room, 1 kitchen that bigger than my current house. In front of the house my mum plant some flowers. My childhood toy was the sand in front of my house. When free I will build a castle with the sand or draw some thing on the sand. Now think back feel it fun and nowadays children where got chance to play with sand because the floor is cover by cement and their parents do not want them become dirty "cat".

Last time my grandma also stay together with us. She is very nice and "sayang" my brother and I. Sometimes my brother and I will gamble with my grandma too. Haha... Fishing(5 cent per point), BackJack(depend on how much u bet) ^^. But human can't fight with DEAD. My grandma pass away when I was 12. When I heard the news that my grandma pass away, I silly till pray to GOD let her alive again. I miss my grandma. T_T

Sometimes give yourself some time sit down and think about the past, you will found that what have happened during the past are sweet memories for us. Although we have some bad experience but it become an important experience for us to make sure do not repeat the same mistake again. Currently I'm trying my best to handle my feeling, it's already one month but I still think about her and the things have happened between us.

Happy Birthday to Yoke Yin(22), Wei Jian(22), Wei Kang(22), and myself(23).

Not motivated!!

Recently really feel myself super duper lazy d. School started for 2 weeks d I still on holiday mood, and I know there still got a lot tasks are waiting me to solve it such as FYP, Advance Engineering Analysis2 tutorial, revision for Control System1. Unfortunately I become a lazy guy d.

I sleep during lecture.

I sleep during tutorial.

Only watching movie when free.(Only think wanna do revision and FYP but no action T_T)

This morning our course was scolded by he head of SOT. Haiz.......

She very disappointed on our performances and attitude on study last semester. She also warned US no more ISSUE from our course.(She praying so hard that we can pass all subjects and transfer our credit to Degree)

Sometimes I was wondering why I need to study so hard. For myself? Parents? Future?

I'm so confusing. Even the reason I chose Mechatronics course I also very hard to tell you guys why I chose it. Actually I'm a guy who do not like to use my brain I like to move my body when working. I think I chose the wrong course d, but what to do I in final year d. "Die die also get the cert 1st".

Who and WHat can motivate me? Any idea? I need some guide d.... I LOST.

Past

Yo... Today is the 1st day of Oct, and today is the day I become a FOOL as will. Why I said I became a FOOL? Cos fool by a gal n her bf. Detail you all can ask me personally.

Anyway start from today I will not be a good guy anymore and will not simply trust anyone included my friends around me (Sorry, if I hurt you my friend. I also need to protect myself). The only thing I can trust is MONEY. That is what I feel currently.

This world is full of different kind of people, although you do not have the intention to hurt them or anything to do with them they still will think of a way to hurt you.

Now I understand why the animation Death Note so famous cause he can kill anyone just by writing their name on the note. It is easy. Wish this thing really exist. LOL (I am gone crazy)

I HATE people

-lie me

-say bad thing about me be hide me.(Just tell me face to face)

-late for the any meeting or outing

So far that's all I can think about. ^^

2nd day

Today is the second day I break up with my gf. At first I was very down and do not know what am I going to do next. Lucky I got friends to confirm me. Friend at Singapore (Clevone), USA (Ru Ching), Australia (Jessie), and Malaysia (Sheng Hao, Stephanie).

This Clevone really super duper good, purposely call me from Singapore and give me advice. Really appreciate it a lot. Still remember when I on phone with her she nearly vomit blood because I such a silly guy, do not want to give up and want her be with me forever. Now I think back I also feel myself very silly.

Ru Ching is a friend that I knew her for about 10 years although we seldom meet but whatever problems she facing she will share with me and my problems I also will share with her too. Once we go out meet or yam cha we can talk a lot. Till she said I am "kay po gal".Haha... She can consider one of my "zhi ji" ^^

Jessie, from the day I know how to use MSN she is the first person I knew from internet and chat everyday. At here I want to apologize to her because after I got gf I seldom chat with her or contact with her. I very sorry. Every time I got problems only will think about you. Hope you forgive me. Anyway want to thank you once again cause when I need someone to talk she always will reply me.

Sheng Hao, I also do not why I will share my feeling with him also. Haha.. Maybe I feel he is a guy that won't simply be CNN spread the news around. Overall he is a helpful guy, when you got any problems you can approach to him if he can do it he sure will help you. :P

Stephanie, this girl I called her "sui lui" (bad girl). Haha... Still remember during Hari Raya I got work at Time Square as promoter. That time I not yet break with my gf but she started to ignore my messages, and this Stephanie is the only friend that can accompany me go lunch and dinner cause she work at Time Square as well. When having our meal she also will try to comfort me and tell me some girl's attitudes. Hope she won't angry me cause call her "sui lui" LOL.

In the period of 1 year and 4 months with my ex-gf(Alexandra). We really love each other a lot and been through hard time together. I still remember the first day(180508) we date as couple. I do not act like myself I very shy to look at her and scare to hold her hand too. Lucky after lunch with her I be brave a bit and hold her hand. LOL. Then we started our date at Jusco. ^^

Since this is the first time we date and she do want any of her parents friends see us we only can walk on first floor, second floor, and roof top. Haha...

After 10 months we couple, the time is come. Valentine's Day. Wow... Day before I created 1 video about us and dedicate to her. She happy till cried and keep playing the video again again. That is what she told me. ^^ At first we though we can't spend the day together. This time really need to thanks GOD. Donno why her parents let her stay at home alone and I know the chance is come. On the date 140209 in the morning we still chatting on msn but once I get know about she will stay home alone I quickly pack my cloths and take bus go Ipoh find her. Haha.. Really crazy but it's worth to spend Valentine's Day with the 1 your love the most. And today is the 1st time I stay at her house, really feel unbelievable.

4 months after Valentine's Day. Finally her parents knew about our relationship and they know we really love each other so that they allow us together. During her dad's birthday lunch on 200609 I has a chance to attend. Today also the 1st time I kiss her dad man. My own daddy I also never kiss before. LOL.. (I'm not a good son). All her dad friends are very friendly and like to joke a lot. But I scare them keep asking me to drink with them cause I will drunk easily.

Time pass very fast, just like speed of light. MAY 2009 is time for her to get start with her campus life. Everyday she was very busy with her homework and assignments, so that we less communicate and partly because I'm not a guy that really can talk. When day goes by she lose the feel on me. That is what her friend told me. Anyway is time for me to quit because I has been annoying her for 2 weeks after I get know that she got crush on other. I everyday can't sleep well everyday think why this kind of thing will happen on me. Made myself damn stress till can't sleep well for 2 weeks. Such a silly guy. Lucky got friend scold me "Why you wanna be so silly, you have to think about yourself also", from Clevone. Haha... Because of her I finally decided to let her go. As long she happy then everything will be fine. I do not wish the 1 I love suffer anymore. Now she with her new bf, from what she told me he a very caring guy. Hope this guy can take good care of her. If not I go down smack him(Still dreaming).

Anyway is time for me to begin my new life. I will be tough. I promise to all my friends who care me. ^^. Before I forget there have 1 more friend I need to thanks her. She is Kimberly. ^^. If not because of her I don think I can with my ex. She help me pass all the presents I want to give my ex and let me stay her house for several day during the Valentine's Day so I can with my ex. Thank you, Kimberly.

Thank you for so patient to read my lame blog. LOL ( I know my grammar suck, I will improve it as soon as possible ^^)